Jen May

IT’S CHER’S BIRTHDAY!!! therumpus: Today is Cher’s...

Mon, 20 May 2013 16:59:02 -0400

IT’S CHER’S BIRTHDAY!!!

Today is Cher’s birthday and that means its a special Cher edition of Madame Clairevoyant, courtesy of her bad-ass illustrator Jen May.

doesn’t seem like it. i thought he would.

Sun, 19 May 2013 13:08:03 -0400

doesn’t seem like it. i thought he would.

One time a stranger emailed me and asked if I would write...

Thu, 16 May 2013 10:15:55 -0400

One time a stranger emailed me and asked if I would write “as if” in my hand writing so she & her best bud could get matching Clueless tattoos. Obviously I did it but I don’t think they ever got the tattoos. Or they never sent pix.

don’t forget to give your mom batteries today

Sun, 12 May 2013 10:47:14 -0400

don’t forget to give your mom batteries today

another collage

Fri, 10 May 2013 14:26:43 -0400

another collage

a collage

Thu, 09 May 2013 11:00:26 -0400

a collage

Anger, Moonstruck, salt, haircuts, feelings & a dead person...

Tue, 07 May 2013 10:42:44 -0400

Anger, Moonstruck, salt, haircuts, feelings & a dead person with flowers. Read all about it!

therumpus:

The Rumblr’s in-house astrologer, Madame Clairevoyant, presents her latest dispatch from the stars:

Today’s image was made specially for Madame Clairevoyant by Jen May

angry scary crazy

Fri, 03 May 2013 10:10:02 -0400

angry scary crazy

FYI for everyone dying to know what I ate 2 weeks ago.

Fri, 03 May 2013 09:30:40 -0400

FYI for everyone dying to know what I ate 2 weeks ago.

this week’s daisy collage

Thu, 02 May 2013 10:29:41 -0400

this week’s daisy collage

therumpus: The Rumblr’s in-house astrologer, Madame...

Tue, 30 Apr 2013 09:42:14 -0400

therumpus:

The Rumblr’s in-house astrologer, Madame Clairevoyant, presents her latest dispatch from the stars..

Today’s image was made specially for Madame Clairevoyant by Jen May.

THIS WEEK’S. Feeling gross & ugly & weird & getting through it & also spooky eyes.

I wrote you go girl in a metal logo font.

Mon, 29 Apr 2013 10:51:48 -0400

I wrote you go girl in a metal logo font.

daisies

Thu, 25 Apr 2013 16:37:00 -0400

daisies

2 important recent screen caps

Wed, 24 Apr 2013 10:17:25 -0400

2 important recent screen caps

Capricorns, it’s time for you to learn about Mars. Also,...

Tue, 23 Apr 2013 09:37:07 -0400

Capricorns, it’s time for you to learn about Mars. Also, growth, bodies, circles.

therumpus:

The Rumblr’s in-house astrologer, Madame Clairevoyant, presents her latest dispatch from the stars:

Aries: This week’s going to feel a little hazy, a little grey, a little too heavy and still somehow a little too light, like it’s missing some small essential thing, a kind of force, a shade of gold or green. Sometimes this type of warm cloudy life is soothing—it can feel safer, better, than seeking brightness and power and joy—but this week the haziness might start to bear down too hard, might start to feel like it’s crushing you. When this happens, reading can help. Walking is better. Swimming is better still. Dreaming is best.

Taurus: This is a week for making yourself known, for making space for yourself, for telling your own truths, even if they’re strange or illegible, even if they’re impossible to say except in a whisper or a shrug or a lie. Make a dress for yourself, make your own strange and invisible paths through your city, build a place that you can live in and feel okay. This is a week for not taking anybody else’s advice, for getting a little wound up, for feeling a little ridiculous over how thoroughly and how deeply your own life belongs to you. Read Bhanu Kapil. Get a little weird.

Gemini: The way the ground feels under you, the way people look at you, this week, might make you feel like you aren’t a real, solid person. It might make you feel like a reflection, a ghost. This is not bad, it’s not even strange, to go a little wild to make sure that you’re still real. It’s good to shake up the air around you, to make vibrations of the air match the vibrations of your beating heart. This is a good week for changes, a good week for moving, a good week to shake things up. See what happens.

Cancer: This week might leave you feeling slow or empty or stuck. It might leave you waiting for a gust of wind to carry you away, a lightning bolt to come down from the sky—jagged and bright—and fill you with an electric power. This feeling of stasis may be harsh and heavy, even painfully real, but it’s easy to make things move again. Open your window and let some air in, open your door and walk outside. You’re always already carrying the energy of the whole world inside of you; this week’s just about fixing the circuits.

Leo: Strange battles are raging inside of you this week. There are moons and tides pulling at you all at once, all in different directions, all at different speeds. Having a heart is such a unfamiliar jumble of a thing; having a body is just as full, just as fraught. It will be a difficult week for decisions, a difficult week if you try to stand firm and tall. Think of all the water in your body, think of all the water in the air, think of yourself as a river, as an ocean, as a whole shifting aquatic world.

Virgo: This week will be full of luck, full of weird and funny surprises—like a snowstorm in October, like the first warm day of the year, like when a wrong turn takes you to your old house or a favorite street or the ocean. Trust your eyes this week, trust your guts, trust your feelings of loneliness and your capacity for joy. Trust that the compass you’ve built from your own crazy guts will carry you through all your days, through all your nights, through every place you could ever find.

Libra: Something in the world, in the air, is going to loosen this week. Your life will empty out a bit, your mind will go a little quiet. This will make space in your head for you to move, room you can fill with songs and echoes. It’s not going to be a lonely week, just one where spending time alone will be rich and fruitful and bright. Wake up early to sit alone in the kitchen. Stay out late to drive home at night on the dark bendy roads. Read books about the planets; read books about discovery.

Scorpio: Everything in your world will start growing around you—wild and fast and steady—this week until you’re left feeling smaller than ever before, more lost, still unsure of how to live in a space that only now is large enough to give you space to breath. This is a week for taking in this new air, for getting your bearings, for focusing, for feeling yourself get brighter. The whole world will respond to the glow your small, strange powers light it with. Practice being loud. Practice singing. Watch movies about deserts.

Sagittarius: If you feel like you are a little too eager this week, a little too messy—try to slow down. Calm your thoughts down enough that you can take a real look at them. Sit with your weird self, with the weird patterns of your brain, past the point where it gets uncomfortable, past the point where it gets boring. Try to be unafraid of the present, try to be unafraid of the future, try to trust both stillness and motion and the occasions in which you can’t tell the difference. Read stories about time travel.

Capricorn: This week you’re going to feel yourself moving in new directions that feel light and surprising, as weird and new as if you were burrowing underground or diving beneath the ocean or floating through the dark sky. It’s a week for drawing maps of your brain, maps of your world, that are odd to look at and hard to read—bright and shifting and expansive. Go swimming, go for a run, eat until you feel sick. Think about the ways your body can move so crazy, so lovely, so sure. Read about Mars.

Aquarius: This week you’re maybe going to feel a little fragile, a little tender, like you can’t stop taking things personally, like you can’t stop small ugly things from burying themselves deep in your floorboards, burrowing into your foundations. Sometimes bitterness feels good and nourishing and important, but sometimes it is better to let it just wash over you, to remember that you are small, that you are different, that you are wise. Look at your face in the mirror until you recall who you are. Take a walk, take a bath, take books with beautiful covers out of the library.

Pisces: This week every mark on the pavement, every cloud in the sky will have you looking for meaning, for clues, for code words and symbols and puzzle pieces that you can put together if you look at them long enough. This week’s will have you looking for answers that can fit within your hand or inside your pocket, dense and contained. All you’ll find, however, are these strange currents of feeling, uncertainties that are bright and dazzling, budding birch trees outside your window. This is how it should be; this is right and good.

Today’s image was made specially for Madame Clairevoyant by Jen May.

It’s John Waters’ birthday! Here’s a picture I...

Mon, 22 Apr 2013 15:05:31 -0400

It’s John Waters’ birthday! Here’s a picture I took of a picture of his bed & chips.

therumpus: The Rumblr’s in-house astrologer, Madame...

Mon, 15 Apr 2013 13:32:03 -0400

therumpus:

The Rumblr’s in-house astrologer, Madame Clairevoyant, presents her latest dispatch from the stars:

Aries: This week you are going to feel powerful, you’ll feel quick and strong and right. This week is a great week for you to make things happen, for you to get what you want—a lucky time. It’s also a time when it’ll be easy for you to be selfish, for you to be distracted, for you to do small cruel things just because you aren’t paying attention. Move through the world with your windows open, feel the sun fall gentle on your face. Feel your power and let it light you up, but be careful with the ways you let it reflect all around you.

Taurus: It seems like a sappy thing to say—a little weird, a little trite—but this is a week for love above anything else, for letting sweet feelings germinate inside of you like tiny seeds, for feeling overpowering warmth and kindness toward the people in your life, toward the places that have fed and sustained you through this whole winter, through your whole life. It’s a good week for spending time around other people and letting this funny glow in you light up the whole room, light up the forest, light up the sky.

Gemini: This week you might feel small, you might feel invisible, you might feel lonely, you might feel weightless, you might feel free. Let this feeling of lightness carry you, let it take you to places where you can breathe easily, where nobody wants a thing from you. This sweet, lonely invisibility can’t sustain a person forever, though. Try to let this feeling run its course, then go swimming. Eat a pizza. Remember how good it is to be a solid person.

Cancer: This is a week for dreaming huge and wild dreams, for imagining a world where you don’t need to worry about yourself or your city or the oceans or people you love. Let your dreams grow large; let them get weird. You’ll have to work for the things you want but right now, this week, it’s better to dream about them, it’s better to imagine the shape of a different world, it’s better to read Bernadette Mayer on your lunch break, it’s better to tell your mom you love her.

Leo: This week is a week for getting clean, for getting new, for letting all your bad feelings leave your body through your pores and through your tears. It’s a week for getting rid, as much as you can, of all of the sadness and resentment you’ve carried in your body all winter, for getting rid of all the small hurts that make it hard for you to live. Try, this week, to go forward with nothing but your small self and your weird bravery and no anger but the anger that you need to get by.

Virgo: This week, the world’s going to feel very large to you. When you walk outside to rainy mornings and sunny afternoons and dense blue nights, when you’re inside your home, when you’re inside your head, it’s going to feel too big for safety, for love, for recognition. You can fight this feeling by working or by walking until you’re too tired to move or by staying home and eating something filling and warm for dinner or by listening to Karen Dalton until you fall asleep.

Libra: This week, the shape of the life you imagine for yourself is going to change—maybe slightly, maybe dramatically. Either way, it’ll have you rethinking things, looking at the world with new life, with new vision, with a sharp and uncanny sense of the sky moving over your head, of the earth shifting under your feet. This is a week when you’ll need sounds and stories more than you’ve ever needed them. You’ll need stories to make the future solid again, to make the world real. Read Octavia Butler.

Scorpio: You might doubt yourself this week, you may look with suspicion at the life all around you, at the streets you move through, at the smiles on your friends’ face. It’s confusing to rethink every choice you’ve ever made; it’s scary to rework and rebuild every structure, every map you’ve ever used to understand this world. Spend time inside this doubt, sit with it, let it blossom. Spend time with people you don’t understand. Hang out with dogs, hang out with babies. Let this weird state of flux open up your world.

Sagittarius: Whatever bad feelings you’ve been holding inside yourself, whatever small sadnesses, they’re all going to burst wide open this week. This tightly wound cord of unhappiness, of dissatisfaction, of boredom is going to snap this week with a force that will surprise you, with a sound like a guitar string, like a harp string, like a bell. This is a perfect week to make changes; it’s a week to leave behind the things you’ve been trying to talk yourself into loving. This is a week to start moving, a week not to be afraid. Listen to Swearin. Pretend to be braver than you are.

Capricorn: You might feel like you’re a little off, this week, like you’re moving one beat too soon, one step too late. Moving this way means you might not feel quite comfortable, quite safe, this week, but it also means that you have access to a different world. Right now you can see things that nobody else can. This is a good moment to spend time by yourself. It’s a good moment for wandering, at your own speed, for going where you want to go, for looking up at the sky, for seeing your own weird thoughts form in the clouds.

Aquarius: This week you’ll be surprised by knowledge that comes to you out of nowhere, out of thin air, sudden and strange. During the most boring moments of your week—when you’re stuck in traffic, in the middle of a long work day—if you let yourself get dreamy, let your mind wander, you’ll come across bright new understandings of the things in your world. This kind of clarity can sometimes be rough or messy or crooked, but it will be bright, it will be yours, it will change everything.

Pisces: As the days get longer, as the world gets larger and brighter, you might start to feel dissatisfied with how things are, you might feel small, stuck, limited. Buy a pair of running shoes or get your bike tuned up—this is a good week to be in motion. Now is a time to leave things behind you, now is a time to come home. This week the world is big enough for new pleasures, big enough for new fears, big enough for whole new ways of being. Go somewhere new, roll down the windows, turn up the radio as loud as you can.

Today’s image was made specially for Madame Clairevoyant by Jen May.

666 Eclipse for Rachel’s birthday and tax day.

Mon, 15 Apr 2013 12:54:23 -0400

666 Eclipse for Rachel’s birthday and tax day.

"Throughout the book, there are collages by artist Jen May that separate each story, but I found..."

Fri, 12 Apr 2013 11:50:08 -0400

“Throughout the book, there are collages by artist Jen May that separate each story, but I found these a built difficult to understand. It is a small quibble.”

- i kind of like this negative review?

DAISIES & ASTROLOGY! This is all real because I really do...

Mon, 08 Apr 2013 13:43:07 -0400

DAISIES & ASTROLOGY! This is all real because I really do need to buy toilet paper this week.

therumpus:

The Rumblr’s in-house astrologer, Madame Clairevoyant, presents her latest dispatch from the stars:

Aries: This week’s going to be gentle, it’s going to be small and easy, a smooth small pebble, a barely opened window on a cool, dark night. This week is for trusting surfaces, trusting the things people tell you and faces they show you, for believing the things you can see. Even though you know that there are depths beyond your reach, things that are not apparent, masks that hide truths—work on honoring and living with simplicity. This week, go to bed early. Read Wisława Szymborska.

Taurus: Think about the spaces you take up in the world, notice the ways that your body acts on it, the ways it acts on your body. It can be intense, even heavy, to listen to the way your voice weaves through the hallways and staircases and alleys of your life, to hear to the way it echoes back to you from weird and faraway places you’ve never even been. You’re bigger and you’re stronger than you think, and this is a wonderful, scary thing. Read Anna Akhmatova. Listen to Erykah Badu.

Gemini: This week your heart’s going to feel so mushy, so tender—when it’s inconvenient, when you’re in meetings, when you’re in grey hallways or on bleak highways. You might feel caught up in thoughts of how fragile everything is. You won’t be able to stop thinking about sweet little babies, about your grandparents, about the trees and dirty rivers of where you live. This kind of love can wear a person out so be tender this week, be fierce and wild, be mixed up, be tired. Read Lynda Barry.

Cancer: Your life will surprise you, this week, when you stop for a second to look at how fully the world has grown up around you, how rich and strange the tiny ecosystems inside your brain and your body are. All the work you’ve been doing to build a life, to build a self that is strong and sturdy and real—suddenly it will burst wide open. This week, it’s going to bloom. Ride your bike for miles and miles. Swim in a lake. Buy a used set of speakers and listen to the songs that make you feel huge and alive.

Leo: Feel your heart get all warm and warped and misty, this week, when you think about ways the world might have been had things been different, if you’d made different or better choices, if the world had been bigger or kinder. Let this feeling live inside you but don’t feed it too much—don’t let it blossom into despair, don’t let it grow stronger than your arms. Read Sylvia Plath or listen to Aaliyah, but then go outside and eat sandwiches and ice cream with your friends. Remember you’re standing on solid ground.

Virgo: This week, measure the shapes and sizes of the feelings you carry inside you, of your dreams, of your bad thoughts. This week is for seeking out and recognizing those things you need to feel okay, to feel whole. It’s for creating spaces where those things can fit, spaces big enough for you to breathe. Sometimes the right thing to do is to shape your feelings, sand their edges down, make them manageable. Right now, it’s better to make the world give you the space you need. Read Derek Walcott and think about history, think about movement, think about storms.

Libra: This week you’ll find yourself looking to the future; you’ll find yourself sketching pictures in your head of a dizzy dreamy life. Let your imagination grow—let it climb mountains, let it blind you like sunlight glinting off the ocean. Let it get bigger than the whole world, big enough that it starts to make you feel afraid. Ride your bike, ride the train, watch the world around you move fast and blurry and bright. The warm days ahead are going to stretch out, so wild, so beautiful, full of a terrifying desire. Read about magic, about heroes, about weirdos.

Scorpio: This week will be exciting, like you’re living a story, a movie, a dream about flying. Let this fill you up—the joy, the excitement—but remember that you’re a person living a life. Remember that you are very special; also remember that you’re not more special than anyone else. Remember the small boredoms of the world. Remember that you have to buy toilet paper and take out the garbage. Remember every person who is special, who is real, who is waiting for you to be solid, to be tender, to be there.

Sagittarius: This is a week for going outside your house. It’s a week for forgetting the ugly thoughts that have been living inside you. Try to remember the truest parts of your self, try not to get so bothered. This week, build a house, or a room, or a small quiet space of your own out of sheer confidence, out of a strange audacity you never even knew you had. Do what you want to do; don’t be afraid. Drive out to the beach and listen to the cold water rushing toward you. Listen to hazy looping songs and think about witches.

Capricorn: This week is a time for dreaming, for planning, for moving, for shaking all the dust out of your head, out of your eyes. This week, travel through all the places you’ve lived in your life, or just look at pictures. Remember the way your old houses smelled in springtime. Feel anger or tenderness or regret or love. Then, go back home to the world you live in right now. Clean your stove, open your windows and air out the house, and get ready for good things to come to you.

Aquarius: This week is going to be wild and tangled, it will be glittering and rich. Your world is a little complicated right now—nothing’s going to be smooth, nothing easy. Your heroes might disappoint you, but the dark places might also surprise you with strange pockets of kindness, of gentleness, of understanding. This week is a good week to be calm, to walk through the spring days, to do what you need to do, to let the world spin whatever way it wants all around you. Read Alice Notley.

Pisces: Things are going to come back to you this week, things that you’ve forgotten, things you never paid any mind to—things now grown up, grown large, grown strong and bright and wild. These things will greet you on the street, they’ll whisper in your ear, they’ll remind you who you’ve been and who you are. Listen closely. Remember every good thing you’ve done; remember every time you’ve been unkind. Be calm this week and be a little quiet. Think of the ways you can move through the world like light, like air, like water.

Today’s image was made specially for Madame Clairevoyant by Jen May.